“Any Promise given is only as sure as the character of the one giving it.”
The character of the promiser is what gives the promise it’s value.
“Character is like a tree and reputation like it’s shadow, the shadow is what we think of it, and the tree is the real thing…” Abraham Lincoln
I recently had a conversation with my eldest grandson about his latest report card. He was telling me how well he did in each of his classes, the grades he received and how happy he was. When he finished I told him that I was happy with him also, and how proud I was of him, which gave him a huge smile. Then I asked him about the grades he was given in citizenship for his behavior and he told me those marks as well. Then he asked me, “Grandpa why do you want to know that?” I told him that those grades were just as important to me. I said, “It’s a reflection of your character, what type of a person you are.” “The class grades tell me what’s going on in your head, and the citizenship grades tell me what’s going on in your heart.”
“The measure of a man’s character is what he would do if he knew he never would be found out.” Thomas Babington Macauley
How we act when people aren’t looking (in his case when his parent’s aren’t looking), is a good gauge of where a person’s heart is. Building character in an individual’s life is a life long process. It must begin when they are very young, it’s not something that just happens it’s something that’s taught and modeled. It’s something that is encouraged and reinforced through parental expectations and discipline.
“But man is born to trouble, as surely as sparks fly upward.”
Job 5:7
As naturally and as generally as sparks from a fire go up into the air, the heart of mankind is drawn to or even seeks out trouble (sin). And it doesn’t stop with the very young.
With my youngest son’s permission I want to share some of his story. He was raised in the church, went to Christian school from K through 12th grade, and was a quiet, mellow and God loving young man. He graduated from high school in the spring of 2005 and in the fall of that year went away to school at a university in
Sometime during that first year away from home he started partying – drinking, smoking pot, hanging out with his teammates and the girls. Not real conducive to an athletes training. He was a “Red Shirt” that first year, and wrestled at a few independent tournaments but only did “so-so”. This, from an outstanding high school wrestler who placed 5th in the nation at the High School National Championships, which earned him All American status.
He came home that first summer a different young man. Distant and elusive, always out with friends, “just hangin out” was his explanation. Doing just enough of what was required to stay in my house, just enough to appease me.
I found out some time after his return home that first summer that he did not intend to return to school in Missouri, but in fact had been offered and accepted another scholarship to a college in northern California. The biggest reason, I realized later was to be closer to his girlfriend (my take on it, not his).
“Those who know your name will trust in you, for you, LORD, have never forsaken those who seek you.” Psalm 9:10
My wife Patsy and I pray for our children every day, we always have. Even more so when they left home and went away to college. This was our fourth child to make this transition into the world. We knew full well the temptations they would each have to face and the percentages were not in our favor that their faith would remain intact, for three of them it didn’t.
Within the first month of my son’s sophomore year, his first at the new school, he was arrested for DUI, went to jail, and was expelled from school (this is the abridged version). He had gotten into some pretty serious trouble.
“O LORD, hear my prayer, listen to my cry for mercy; in your faithfulness and righteousness.”
When I eventually found out about it I, along with my two older sons drove the 6½ hours north to be present at the final Disciplinary Committee hearing, where his expulsion would be finalized. I prayed all the way for God’s favor to be with my son and for an opportunity to address the committee. My prayers were answered.
“I entreated Your favor with my whole heart; be merciful to me according to Your word.”
I was given an opportunity to address the committee, and made an appeal to allow my son to remain in school. It was granted. He was put on probation and had many other restrictions placed upon him, but he was in school. With court proceedings, First Offender classes, AA classes, community service, a job, school, and trying to wrestle, he was overwhelmed. He struggled but made it through the school year.
He came home for the summer broken and angry. He continued with his AA classes and got a job in a warehouse to pay all the bills he had accumulated from his troubles, court fees, lawyer fees, class fees etc. He expressed to me many times feeling like the weight of world was on his shoulders. He felt like he was always being treated unfairly. Life wasn’t so easy anymore, not like it was when he was a kid under dad and mom’s watchful eye and protection. Not like it was when he was living right and following the Lord.
Patsy and I have spent a lot of time on our knees over the years. All of our sons have struggled and gone through there own personal issues. As parents you hurt when your children are hurting. You cry with them and for them. Our faith provided for us an outlet, a place to find peace. God became our refuge and our strength; we purposed to put our trust in Him.
“Let us hold unswervingly to the hope we profess, for he who promised is faithful.”
Hebrews 10:23
My son decided not to return to school for his junior year, to walk away from his scholarship, to continue working and eventually he moved into an apartment with his girlfriend. Six months later he was out of a job, moving back home and his girlfriend was pregnant. Talk about a tailspin! I believe God was trying to get his attention in answer to our prayers.
His son, our latest grandson was born in March of last year, eight weeks early. He weighed 3 lbs. 5 oz. and remained in the NIC-U for nearly a month. When he got out of the hospital he came home to our house. And what a blessing he has been to us. My son’s relationship with his girlfriend soon dissolved and custody of the baby became an issue of contention. With police and courts and lawyers involved he felt like his life was literally falling apart. Me and Patsy felt overwhelmed as well.
What did we do wrong? What could we have done differently? Is this our fault? God where are you? These are just some of the questions a parent in my position would naturally ask himself or herself. We had to stand on God’s promise to bring our son back.
“Train up a child in the way he should go: and when he is old, he will not depart from it.” Proverbs 22:6
This verse provides a ray of hope to those who, having reared their child in the best way they knew, have had their hearts broken as their child rebels and goes astray. They agonize under the pain that God recognized to be one of the deepest sorrows of human existence (Proverbs 10:1; 15:20; 17:21,25). To those parents this verse gives hope that when he is old the prodigal will return.
A PROMISE is only as good as the person who makes it.
The essence of God’s character is in itself a promise. Who He is determines what He will do and how He will act. Through the Scripture, each time God reveals something of His nature, He is promising us that He will be true to that nature in any circumstance.
“God is not a man, that he should lie, nor a son of man, that he should change his mind. Does he speak and then not act? Does he promise and not fulfill? Numbers 23:19
God has always dealt with His people by communicating promises to them. By promising first, then performing what He has promised, He awakens in us the desire and expectation that find their outlet in the prayer of faith. His promises prompt prayer.
We prayed for our son to return to us, the quiet spirited, joyful, happy, God loving son that had left our home years earlier and we did believe God for no less.
God makes promises to us for the reason of letting us know what He has available to us, if only we would ask. His promises are meant to ignite faith and expectation and desire, and then to point us to Him. His promises act to bind our hearts to His. His promises turn our eyes toward Him.
It’s been a few months now since our sons return, Hallelujah! I see him getting stronger each day in his walk with the Lord. I have also noticed a smile on his face more often, something I hadn’t seen in a long time. In talking to him recently, I heard him articulate clearly his thoughts about the valley of darkness he has just recently immerged from, and his understanding of how he got there. This is the beginning point of a full restoration. Thank you Lord!
I was truly blessed this past Sunday to stand beside him and my oldest son as part of the Easter choir at church, singing praises to our God. It brought tears to my eyes as I praised the Lord for His faithfulness to His promises. God is so good.
God wants to fulfill the desire of your heart. A person who is seasoned in praying the promises knows to let God fulfill the desire of your heart in His way at His time. If we are focused on God, then we will never be disappointed.
“God who has called you into fellowship with his Son Jesus Christ our Lord is faithful.”
1 Corinthians 1:9
God Bless and Press On
Larry
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